I brought a package of light firm tofu for lunch that was intended to accompany my salad. How boring, right?! But, at the last minute, I was feeling like dessert would make a much more satisfying lunch so that's absolutely what I did. Yeah, that's right.. i said it! I ditched my salad (saving it for later), warmed up my tofu with some kashi puffs, chocolate chips, stevia, PB2 and became a very happy camper.
I think I've been on a sweet streak this week because for dinner last night, i had d'anjou pear oatmeal/cobbler. It made me feel like a kid again where there's that special and rare evening that your mom says "we're having breakfast for dinner!" and it's practically the best news ever. haha. Needless to say, it was a nice little switcheroo...
Today has been kind of blah as I try to sort my thoughts...
Feeling:
- Introspective
- Quiet
- Ambivalent.
- To rid some of these ED thoughts.
- Take a nap.
- To learn how to be more content and mindful of the present rather than always looking ahead.
Because:
- I've noticed I've been restricting this week after seeing the scale number jump even though I'm still below my normal weight.
- I'm a sleepy girl at the moment.
- I don't like not knowing.
Procrastinating on:
- Studying for the GRE.
Looking forward to:
- Dinner with my momma tonight.
- Dinner with my gma and a great blogger friend tomorrow evening PLUS a movie!!
- Therapy Thursday
Daily Gratitude: (yes, i stole this idea from the lovely Kim)
- I woke up this morning :)
- New York is less than 3 weeks away.
- Tomorrow is FRIDAY!
Lastly:
I receive the newsletter/Gwyneth Paltrow blog and it had a post on there today about addiction. How fitting... Below is the link, but here were some points mentioned that I thought stood out:
Kabbalah teaches that we are in this world to achieve lasting and true fulfillment. However, our wires often get crossed and we think this fulfillment can come from physicality. This is never the case. The material world always leaves us wanting more. There is a saying, “If today I have one then tomorrow I want two, and if today I have 100, then tomorrow I will want 200.”
The addiction battles many of us fight are here to push us toward finding a deeper fulfillment, which comes from connecting to the real things in life: love, compassion, sharing and revealing our true essence.
Our soul has this massive thirst, and we are trying to quench it with a teaspoon.
Therefore, there are three essential things we can do to begin the process of leaving addictive behavior behind:
1. Realize these yearnings are coming from a true place (our soul) telling us we need to do more, and we can do and be more.
2. Begin a process of both realizing and connecting to our true essence by focusing, meditating and becoming more conscious of our thoughts, behaviors and true potential.
3. Do actions that take us out of selfish behavior. Become a more giving person. This helps us be less busy with ourselves.
Being addicted doesn’t make us bad, weak or hopeless. Just the opposite. It means we have a unique soul that wants more. We aren’t satisfied with the status quo. We have a burning desire to connect to something bigger than ourselves. And as we come to understand the source of our desires, and stop letting our addictions distract us from our true essence, we can find a lasting, uninterrupted level of fulfillment.
Have a lovely Thursday!!
I like that idea of being more giving to others. I feel incredibly self-centered and selfish by my constant thoughts and it would be great to channel that energy to others.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh, I get that GOOP newsletter and I thought about doing a post about this latest one. There were interesting things in there.
ReplyDeleteWow, NY is 3 weeks away? Woohoo! I can't wait to hang out tomorrow :)
P.s. my spam-prevention word was "of lard." What?
ReplyDelete"Our soul has this massive thirst, and we are trying to quench it with a teaspoon."
ReplyDeleteI think this is very true, and similar to an analogy that another blogger made earlier in the week about anorexia being like trying to stop the Titanic from sinking with bubblegum! The irony is that the things we choose to try and fill holes with generally make them bigger in the long term. Anorexia makes people isolated from any sense of community, belonging or meaning in life, although it seems to promise the opposite.
I love tofu! Dessert for lunch - what's not to like :)
I had dessert for dinner tonight! It was delicious and it completely satisfied my sweet tooth. NY is going to be so much fun! I always love going :)
ReplyDeleteOh that's an inspiring post, the last one really rings true! Thanks for the blog comments!
ReplyDeletelaur! i LOVE LOVE LOVE this post so much, thanks for sharing your feelings (i love this method, ill have to try it myself!) and the amazing consideration at the end -- it's such a beautiful way of looking at how we struggle, and really gave me a lot of hope -- i'll be referring to it often!
ReplyDeletealso loving the breakfast for dinner, but thats a given! =) xoxox
you are going to NY? wait...whaaaaat? how did I miss this? fill me in!!!!!!!! it'll be awesome :D
ReplyDeletei love the way you formatted this post- makes it so much easier when things are broken down to identify where problems are/what's going on.
I've been on a sweet streak lately do...summer = sweet, no?
Love the consideration, and so true...happiness doesn't lie in anything external.
have a good weekend (how's casual Friday working out now?)
This was such an inspiring post. My fave part was:
ReplyDelete"Our soul has this massive thirst, and we are trying to quench it with a teaspoon."
I totally agree with that, but I think often it's because we don't know how to hydrate our soul. We don't know where to begin or how to do it or how to make time for it. And that's partly because our addictions are getting in the way.
Thank you for sharing this with us. I really thought it was a great post.
i recieved this newsletter too and i totally LOVED IT.
ReplyDeleteyay for your yummy eats!!
p.s.: i haven't forgot about your collage, i promisse ;)
Lovely laurennnn
ReplyDeleteI still need to write back to your email, I will, promise!
I'm sorry it sounds like you've been struggling a bit this week, but you have a great attitude about everything! I hope you had fun with your gma and bloggie friend, that's so cool! Which movie?? NYC??! How did I not know about your trip? You probs told me and then I forgot, but either way that's really realyl cool and I know you'll have so much fun! Love that newsletter...but cmon Gwenyth...GOOP? What a craptastic sounding name!
LOVE YOU GIRL and thanks so much for all the support lately, you're the best! Have a great weekend m'dear!
haha... i loved reading about your tofu and salad intro and then switching it up to what you really wanted. that's how it should be! well done!
ReplyDeletethan you for sharing that post from the other blog with us. i love reading what these clebs have to say about addictions. and many of the things are so well said.
have a lovely weekend love
xxx
hey lovely!!
ReplyDeletei sent you the email with your image. i hope i didnt end up on your spam folder.
anyways
let me know what you think
=***
Tofu is so versatile! It can be used in so many different dishes. I actually just like eating it plain, which is kind of gross, I know. :-)
ReplyDeleteGood luck studying for the GRE. I was so glad when I got that over with. You'll do great!
Hope you had a great weekend!